Permission to breathe
Last year, I read The Surrender Experiment by Michael Singer. I didn’t want to at first. I thought “I got this. I am doing all the things right now to be spiritual and be one with the world and God and to surrender. Blah blah blah”. The usual inner critic resistance.
I paused. I checked in with my guide. Was this something I was called to read and the answer was YES.
When I look back at all the incredibly magical moments in my life when I was terrified and moved ahead with a desire I had – even when it made zero sense – I moved ahead in total surrender. In the total FEMININE. I didn’t try to control anything (and when I did, I would flop hard) or make anything happen. Everything would unfold perfectly. I didn’t have to know what to do; I had faith that what I needed to learn or know would be revealed to me.
- certain relationships with men
- organizing the Vagina Monologues – a large campaign in Chicago
- starting my business as an intimacy coach
- making money
I’m in that space right now. I’ve had zero desire to control my life or do it “my way”. I’ve given the reigns to God as my guide. It’s been working well. God is the masculine energy I’ve been needing and I’ve been listening. He has been taking care of me.
He is me (No, God isn’t a man. God is love. I just happen to use a male pronoun)
I feel at peace.
I quickly interrupt old patterns that serve to make me believe I’m worthless and alone.
I choose joy more often than not.
I’ve taken lots of data over my lifetime. When I am fearful and go into control mode – people, situations – I fail. When I have faith, surrender to the loving voice inside me, and know I am taken care of always – I thrive and feel happy.
It’s a moment to moment practice and relationships are great platforms for such practice. Because I know you are trying to control someone in your life. Someone is pissing you off or not doing what you think you need. Someone isn’t moving fast enough to meet your needs. You’re not trusting someone. What if you choose to do nothing?
When I say do nothing, I don’t mean distract yourself.
I mean PAUSE and listen.
Listen to what’s happening in your mind – who is speaking? The inner critic or your guide?
When you hear a calm, loving voice do you listen to it?
Practice listening today. Just for today and follow where it takes you. You don’t have to like it and it doesn’t have to make sense. You simply don’t know where your divine wisdom will lead you. You just have to believe that you ARE it. You HAVE it.
Life is not as dark as you’d like to believe. Start believing in joy.
We love you fiercely!
Heather & Sophia